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In more relaxed, less devout families, hand holding and one-arm hugs can be tolerated to a certain extent but that’s about as far as it goes.
This doesn’t mean that rules aren’t broken however.
resize=300,195&ssl=1 300w" sizes="(max-width: 530px) 100vw, 530px" data-recalc-dims="1" / It’s time.
I said I’d write about it eventually and here it is; forbidden love between a Middle Eastern girl with no English and a bloke from Australia learning Arabic, as well as the important lessons learned from the whole experience. At first there was nothing forbidden about it at all – we met, we did the right thing and approached her father for permission, he gave us the green light, preparations for the engagement ceremony were made – everything was perfect.
He asked me questions about everything – particularly finances.
We put pen to paper about my present and future financial situation including debts and assets, details about how much the engagement ring and ceremony would cost, the wedding and gold, the honeymoon and then of course, where we’d be living and how much that would cost.
It should give you some idea of what’s usually expected in Egyptian society if you ever meet the man or woman of your dreams. I went on two ‘dates’ (by that I mean hanging out in populated areas getting to know each other) with this girl at which time she told me that I needed to meet her father and request his permission to continue seeing her.
It was either this or we stop seeing each other altogether.
Today I’ve decided to share a few lessons with you that I learned from the whole experience. Some guys in the West still have the decency to talk to the girl’s father before asking her to marry him. In Egypt (and I suspect all over the Arab world) this is something that needs to be done right at the start when you start dating.about myself, my plans and my intentions with the man’s daughter.It’d be an opportunity to make a verbal contract of sorts between the father and myself. Traditionally, this kind of over a bride-to-be is done with both peoples’ parents there and I suspect in a lot of areas (especially rural places) it’s almost like a business transaction.I was fortunate that I had these people to back me up.I’m not sure how somebody else with no ties to an Arabic-speaking community could get around this.Let me tell you something – in poorer parts of world it can be just as much of a problem as it is in wealthier nations (sometimes much worse).Now I’m not trying to generalize at all (apologies to anyone if this comes across as offensive) but one thing I did learn in Egypt is that it can be a huge obstacle for couples.For Muslims especially there’s the issue of a dowry which can be money, gold and assets.Because I didn’t have family with me and no one present to confirm who I was or if I could be trusted, the father had to contact Egyptians who knew me back in Australia to verify everything.Even though my bride-to-be’s family knew I had very little at the time, to many of her extended family I was regarded as someone of a much higher status for the simple fact that I was from a Western nation.In reality of course I wasn’t any different from anyone else.